I saw a headline in the news earlier this week about rap producer Marion "Suge" Knight and how he had been involved in a fight at a private party at the W after the NBA All-Star Game which was in Phoenix last weekend.  The story reminded me of my experience at the W and I figured I would share it.

At the end of October of last year I had the opportunity to attend the grand opening of the Bliss Spa at the W Hotel in Scottsdale.  Now W Hotels are synonymous with pretentious douche baggery as are Bliss Spa's and this particular combo is located in the snatch bag capital of the south west.  Let me show you a few notes from the ol' invite: 

"Dress is casual unless you want hit the W's Living Room lounge or Sushi Roku restaurant after your visit, in which case we'd recommend Scottsdale fabulous attire. Please note final parking and entrance details below and see you at Bliss!"

And:

"Free 3-hour street parking is located within walking distance of the east entrance of the W Hotel or in the Galleria Corporate Centre parking garage near the corner of Drinkwater Boulevard and Stetson Drive."

It is with these terms in mind that I want you all to try to picture the following scene.  My partner in crime, Sweet D is responsible for getting me into this whole experience so she agreed to pick me up and we would ride together.  We both read enough of the invite to pick up on the casual dress part and as luck would have it we were both wearing black t-shirts, jeans, black flip-flops and huge black sunglasses.  Neither of us paid a bit of attention to the part about parking so we rolled up to the valet in her wicked fly and equally bad ass Kia and find out that it is ridiculously cheap to have them park the car so we go for it.  Now just like every other valet service this place will park all the really high end cars right out front for everyone to see and will park all the regular cars in some underground parking garage.  When I stepped out of the Kia there was a Mazarati parked right beside me.  Frickin' sweet.  Now we have to enter the hotel thought the main lobby which is like an art museum with a bar.  As we got near the registration desk some anorexic cunty chick looked down her nose at us and said "You two simply must be here for the salon event" and hurried us off down the hall before anyone else saw us!  We got to the event and hung out for a while then finally wandered off, right back through the front lobby, just like we came in!  Smooth.